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Dirt Clods and Other Swell Stuff Bathhouse Rafters The first bathhouse at the Ritzville swimming pool that I remember as a kid was a wooden structure built by the Walla Walla Indians in the early 1600s. Okay. You got me. Ritzville wasn’t founded until 1881. Just trust me, it was an old building with lots of holes and open spaces and if you were willing to risk your life climbing into the rafters you might get a peek into the girls’ side. Boys of every age risked their lives weekly just to get a peek at several of the local girls in their birthday suits. Poolside you could see them in their swim suits but that was not nearly as interesting. The girl I most wanted to see naked was life guard Jane. Just seeing her bare breasts would be enough to carry me into my college years. I had heard stories from several of the bigger boys that fueled my desire to climb into the rafters and peer into the girls’ dressing room. If you got caught you were banned from the swimming pool for a month. If you got caught a second time you spent the rest of the summer out of water. Everybody knew this because Lonny, one of the big boys, had already received a summer sentence. The best time to do it was when the pool was full of swimmers for four reasons: 1) there were more girls, 2) there was lots of noise so the girls wouldn’t hear you climbing, 3) everybody was in a hurry to get into their suit so they wouldn’t be looking up, and 4) the lifeguards were busy watching swimmers so they were not in the bathhouse. The girls of most interest, for obvious reasons, were in their mid-teens and older. They were also the ones that did not come to the pool already dressed in their swimming suits. The best time of day to see the naked girl of your dreams was usually 4 to 4:30 p.m. Why, you ask? The pool closed at 5 p.m. for dinner and reopened at 6 p.m. The younger girls who came to the pool already suited up stayed in the pool as long as they could. The older girls wanted to be dressed and out of the bathhouse before the herd of flat-chesters rushed through the stables. It was Friday at 4:10 p.m. Three stunningly beautiful bodies left the pool deck for the girls dressing room. Benny and I left the pool deck for the boy's dressing room. Benny was my lookout as I quietly carried the garbage can to the end of the wall between the two dressing rooms. I turned the can upside down and climbed on top of it. Now I had to grab the base of the rafters and pull my self up . . . very quietly. As I did, Benny hustled over and returned the can to its original location so if anyone came in they would not suspect anything. I got into the small space in the rafters and pulled my feet up. Unless you looked up directly from either dressing room to the area where I was laying, you would not know I was there. All of this positioning only took about 45 seconds. What? I couldn’t believe my eyes. The three beauties were already dressed! How was that possible? Then it dawned on me. When they came into the dressing room their suits had already dried. They put their clothes on over their suits!!! Damn! Damn! Damn! Okay, I thought, I’ll just stay up here and wait for the next girl to come into my peeping lair. Let me think. Which buxom babe is still out there? I couldn’t think of one. I was taking this incredible risk for nothing. I best get down quick. “Benny, bring over the can,” I called in a quiet voice. No answer. I called twice more. No answer. Then I heard the whistle to clear the pool. Now I was stuck. I tried to lay as flat as possible so no one would see me. My only chance to get out of this was to wait until everybody was gone between 5 p.m. and 6 p.m. for dinner. Both dressing rooms emptied. I knew the lifeguard, Scotty, who ate dinner at my house, would leave as soon as possible. I waited five minutes, then started to get down. Suddenly, Jane the lifeguard came into the girls dressing room. Oh my God! She stripped off her bathing suit and for 30 amazing seconds I saw her absolutely stunningly naked, an image that took me not just into college but through graduate school. I couldn’t believe how sexy she looked. No wonder Lonny risked it all for a second look. She got dressed and left. Now I had to get down . . . without the garbage can. I hung my legs over the wall, slid my belly and chest down until I was just hanging in air gripping the top of the wall. Finally, I dropped the rest of the way down, about four feet. Because I was still in my swimming suit with no shoes or sandals, I landed on my bare feet in a pool of water. On contact with the wet concrete floor my feet slid out from under me and I ended up flat on my back. I laid there believing that I had just broken every bone in my body. Then I realized I felt no pain. I must already be dead, I thought. Slowly, I moved one leg, then the other, then both arms, then I raised my head. Unbelievably, I was unhurt. My fall had been broken by the pile of forgotten towels and other garbage I had dumped when turning over the garbage can. When Benny put it back in place he didn’t bother to pick up the stuff I dumped. I got up and quickly exited the bathhouse without anyone seeing me. When I got home for dinner, it was 5:45 p.m. and Scotty had already finished eating. I sat down and waited for the inquisition from Mom. Dad was still eating and was not going to address this issue until he was finished. “Well?” she asked. “Sorry I’m late. I was with Jane and just lost track of time.” Mom looked at Dad and said, “I told you it was time to buy him a watch.” Dad smiled and said, “if he was with Jane, the watch wouldn’t have mattered.” Boy, did he have that right! By the way, the next day Benny said he just got scared and left for home. For that feeble excuse I told him nothing. He didn’t deserve to hear any of the delicious details. |